Day 4: I am All of Me
"It's not an adventure if everything goes as planned". It's only been four days and I can already attest to this.
Our day started off at 5 this morning with a plan and an intent to explore the Forbidden City and a mission to buy clothes for myself. We left our apartments around 6:15 and walked to the subway station. Thankfully it was fairly close to us and not too difficult to figure out; we had outlined the stops and directions the night before. The subway was packed and full of busy people. It was my first time riding it and I felt so overwhelmed by the constant rush of people running from one metro to the next. Chinese people are not afraid to push and shove past you. Our first mishap was when we had a disagreement of which stop we were supposed to take. As we argued and talked about what to do, the subway door closed and left with 3 people while the other 3 stayed behind. I was one of the 3 who did not get on the subway. We reunited at the 4th exit and Jocelyn explained how she has witnessed someone get caught on the subway door before and that we need to be careful and aware before entering.
Once we arrived at the Forbidden City, I was completely speechless. There was so much to see, so much history to read and learn about. More commonly referred to as the Palace Museum, it was built during the Ming Dynasty. The ancient red walls and intricate artwork separated each section of the palace. Just to enter the imperial palace we had to get a separate ticket in addition to the Forbidden City. Considered the world's largest palace complex, I was so taken back by the beauty of the place. My favorite palace and one of the last was called Palace of the Heavenly Purity. It was known as Hua Men which implied: "Heaven and earth are bright under the sun and moon and the while world is open and peaceful".
With our determined minds and ambitious hearts, we set out to what we thought was Tiann'amen Square at first, but was actually the Jingshan Park. The park was filled with luscious green trees. The serenity of the place gave me a deep sense of calmness. We walked up to the top of one of the pavilions to a Buddhist temple that overlooked the entire Forbidden City. This for me was the highlight of today. At the top of the temple, a sacred place of worship and guidance, I found myself. As I sat at the top, I felt so whole, like I didn't belong to anyone and no one had any part of me. I felt as if I was and am all of me.
Our last stop was at Xidan Joy City Mall. It was a 6 story mall filled with the world's largest escalator. It was the biggest mall I had ever been in before. We went to several shops, skipping over every brand name store that we saw. I finally bought some clothes, enough to last me for the next 7 weeks. I wanted to purchase some makeup before leaving so we went to Sephora. No one spoke English and the store didn't sell a shade anywhere close to mine. At first I was incredibly offended, but just temporarily because I realized that they often don't get visitors of darker complexion. The shade names were "Medium, light-medium, light, and fair." I had never ran into a problem such as this because I always expected beauty products to come in my color. But was this the mind set of a white hegemonic ideology?
The subway home felt long and tiring. My blistered feet ached from the walking and the discomfort of shoes that were too big for me. The same incident as the first happened again, but this time it was a much closer call and with two people getting separated from the group. Michaela got slightly stuck between the subway doors. Even writing about it now makes me laugh about the situation.
I knew that I would find myself at China, but I didn't expect it to be this soon. Honestly, China found me because it wouldn't have mattered where I was, I just needed a change in environment to see that I was strong enough to go through anything that I set my mind to.
Our day started off at 5 this morning with a plan and an intent to explore the Forbidden City and a mission to buy clothes for myself. We left our apartments around 6:15 and walked to the subway station. Thankfully it was fairly close to us and not too difficult to figure out; we had outlined the stops and directions the night before. The subway was packed and full of busy people. It was my first time riding it and I felt so overwhelmed by the constant rush of people running from one metro to the next. Chinese people are not afraid to push and shove past you. Our first mishap was when we had a disagreement of which stop we were supposed to take. As we argued and talked about what to do, the subway door closed and left with 3 people while the other 3 stayed behind. I was one of the 3 who did not get on the subway. We reunited at the 4th exit and Jocelyn explained how she has witnessed someone get caught on the subway door before and that we need to be careful and aware before entering.
Once we arrived at the Forbidden City, I was completely speechless. There was so much to see, so much history to read and learn about. More commonly referred to as the Palace Museum, it was built during the Ming Dynasty. The ancient red walls and intricate artwork separated each section of the palace. Just to enter the imperial palace we had to get a separate ticket in addition to the Forbidden City. Considered the world's largest palace complex, I was so taken back by the beauty of the place. My favorite palace and one of the last was called Palace of the Heavenly Purity. It was known as Hua Men which implied: "Heaven and earth are bright under the sun and moon and the while world is open and peaceful".
With our determined minds and ambitious hearts, we set out to what we thought was Tiann'amen Square at first, but was actually the Jingshan Park. The park was filled with luscious green trees. The serenity of the place gave me a deep sense of calmness. We walked up to the top of one of the pavilions to a Buddhist temple that overlooked the entire Forbidden City. This for me was the highlight of today. At the top of the temple, a sacred place of worship and guidance, I found myself. As I sat at the top, I felt so whole, like I didn't belong to anyone and no one had any part of me. I felt as if I was and am all of me.
I don't think that I will ever get used to Chinese people taking pictures of us, as if we were exotic or unique in someway. Most of them are not even discreet or subtle about it, but instead ask us if they can take a picture with us. If we said yes to one person, a crowd would appear and we had to stop what we were doing and take pictures with everyone. This could last anywhere from a minute to an hour or more. I couldn't stop laughing when we were at Tiann'amen Square. We all decided to sit on the ground because we needed a break from all of the walking we had just done. I was enjoying the bright colorful flowers, listening to Michaela tell a story and observing people passing by, but when I turned around, a swarm of Chinese people were behind us, staring at our group of American girls. Many of them had their cameras out, smiling while photographing us, without our consent or approval. It felt weird to be treated like an "Other" because their obsession with blonde hair blue-eyed people was evident.
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| Me taking a picture of people taking a picture of us |
I knew that I would find myself at China, but I didn't expect it to be this soon. Honestly, China found me because it wouldn't have mattered where I was, I just needed a change in environment to see that I was strong enough to go through anything that I set my mind to.
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